Do you ever wake up thinking, “Dear God, let there be no Trump news today?” Well, us too. But, alas, that perfect morning isn’t here yet. Some of the stories we’re following in the news include:


Crooks and Liars writer News Hound Ellen notes with horror that  Fox News host Jeanine Pirro and two of her guests decided on the air that Robert Mueller is a greater threat to America than Putin. So a Marine Corps vet and combat hero is a threat, but a Russian despot isn’t. Lovely. Insane, but lovely.


Here’s a goodie. The Washington Post is reporting that a GOP candidate for the Florida state house, Melissa Howard, said on her resume that she’d graduated from Miami University. Only problem? The school had never heard of her, and the diploma she offered as proof has been proven a fake. But, heck, the GOP hates college anyway, so…


There’s a Trump Toad named Robert Blau. He was appointed the head of something called the Millennium Challenge Corporation (MCC). Under former presidents, the MCC did good things for development in other countries. Under Trump and his little boy Blau, it has become a hiring hall for Trumpoid flacks who get a job for being loyal. The good news, if any, is that Blau is resigning. Why? No one is quite sure. But we can fantasize, can’t we?


Peter Strzok is the FBI agent that just got fired for (gasp) tweeting disapproving things about Donald Trump. Now, Trump is tweeting back, and citing crazed tweets from Strzok to show that the FBI is biased against him. The problem? 45 is re-tweeting fake tweets, things that Strzok himself never said. In other words, fake news about fake news.


The Washington Post is reporting that Trump’s VA is forcing vets to undergo additional exams to “prove” they really need the care they’re getting. This is a cost cutting measure which, of course, is costing millions of dollars that could go to real medical problems.


West Virginia is moving to impeach all the sitting members of its supreme court for a variety of alleged crimes. The question is, though, are the charges real, or is it all just a ploy to remove the judges and allow the Republican Governor to appoint new, conservative ones. If it is the latter, then we may have a real problem on our collective hands as the GOP attempts another pseudo-legal coup.


Meanwhile, the New York Times is reporting that McGahn, White House Counsel, Has Cooperated Extensively in Mueller Inquiry. It seems that Trump’s lawyer is talking an awful lot to Mr. Mueller. Not that we mind, but we are curious. Why? Maybe because Mr. McGahn figures there’s a life after Trump, and he doesn’t want to be in jail when it happens?


And last for the day, we learn from Newsweek that Omarosa Manigault Newman has said that Donald Drumpf has a way of keeping his disgruntled wife, Melania, under control. To wit, if she divorces him, he’ll have her stripped of her citizenship and deported.


True? False?


We don’t know, but Ms. Melania, consider…there are worse places to be than Slovenia. The Orange One’s bedroom is one of them.